How to put your foot in your mouth....

I have, what my friend likes to call diarrhea of the mouth. When I’m uncomfortable I ramble to fill silence, and when I have a beer its amplified.

If you have never put your foot in your mouth, follow these 3 simple steps, and I guarantee success.

Step 1: Always look at the person. Is there something unusual about their appearance? Are they wearing something particularity hideous? If so, point it out to them.

Step 2 Gossip really loudly. Maybe they are in the same room and will overhear you!

Step 3 Always say the first thing that pops into your mind, don't filter anything! Do it as often as possible. It will get easier each time, trust me.

Yesterday in Orthopaedic Assessments, I called my instructor an ass. Not in so many words, but yeah.... He announced he was giving us 20 minutes to prepare for spot testing. The class broke into smaller groups all going over the carpals, soft tissues, special tests, ranges of motion and conditions for the wrist. The group I was in was having a difference of opinion, so I pipe up, "Alan" that's the instructor, "could you come over and help us out with this, but try not to be so arrogant about it" this is when I started to go downhill "I mean you know your stuff, and because you know it so well, you talk down us, and.." that's when my friend kicked me.

The foot in the mouth routine is second nature to me. I do this kind of crap far too often. And as much as I hate that moment when I realize I just said something I really shouldn’t have said…I continue to put myself in these situations.

Because I’m super smart.

Because I talk too much.

And because I lack the brain to mouth filter.