Friday, December 24, 2010

Dear Santa, I think its time you retire

I don`t remember when I debunked the Santa theory, how it happened, or even why. I do remember that for years afterward I continued to play along. (Party for the benefit of my three younger sisters, partly because I could continue to request specific gifts from the big guy.)

With kiddo now being 11, I`m finding that I just couldn't`t be bothered to keep up the facade any longer. Year after year the fat guy gets specially baked cookies and all the credit, while I do all the work. How is that fair exactly?

Now I'm not about to pull a Grinch. I do have a plan! It goes a little something like this...

Dear Kiddo, thank you for taking the time to write me that wonderful letter and for baking me the tasty cookies. Once again, I am glad you did not let your mother bake them or I might have gotten some kind of food poisoning.
This year, I only have one present to leave you because your family has been so amazing and taken care of all the items on your list.
Be good, and have wonderful holiday.
HoHoHo, Santa

Sorry Santa, but your being forced into retirement.


  1. i kept up the illusion for a while, too. i think my mom actually told me once that if i didn't believe in santa i wouldn't get any presents, so i learned to become an actor. ^_^

  2. It's about time someone told Santa where to go. Good way to wean them.
    Merry Christmas.

  3. I agree. I wish my mom did that with me and the tooth fairy.

  4. You know, the man is probably tired of the endless routine. Year after year after year...