please take your seats and turn off your cell phone...

I've been asked to be the master of ceremonies at my sister's wedding on August 3rd. It's not the first time I have been asked to MC, (I did it for another sister 5 years ago) and its not the second time I wrote up a "script" for it (husband has also MC'd in the past with my help).

I have a few ideas I'm working on, the first being advice for the new couple...

For the bride:
Don’t let him plan your summer vacation, unless you really like bar-b-qing in your back yard.

If you ask his opinion on something and he says “I don’t know” or “I don’t care” it really means that he does not know or does not care.

Let him pretend he’s in charge, it will take him 4 or 5 years to realize the difference and by then it will be too late.

For the groom:
There is no right answer to “do this make me look fat?” if she thought it looked ok, she wouldn’t be asking.

If you go shopping together and she leaves you alone in the bra and underwear section, do not browse.

The second being the shoe game, where you sit the bride and groom back to back, and ask them to remove their shoes, then ask a series of questions that answer by holding up the shoe of the person who best fits the answer...

Who is up first in the morning?
Who takes longer to get ready?
Who apologizes first after an argument?
Who said "i love you" first?
Who mentioned marriage first?
Who makes all the decisions?

So, I'm looking for more advice... wedding advice that it. If you could offer up 1 piece of marriage gold to the new couple, what would it be?

If you have any great jokes or 1 liners, I'll take those too!