Monday, August 8, 2011

20 Questions with a Cashier

I know, I know.. bad BAD baygirl! This whole moving this is a pain in the arse (I would say a good pain, but honestly is there a such thing as a good pain in the arse? Mind you there are people into some freaky stuff...)

Anyway, husband and I are getting the house ready to be listed, and the chore list seems to be never ending, the roof needed new shingles after that nasty wind storm a few months ago, the shower needed to be re-grouted, the baseboards needed to be painted and replaced, the ceilings needed to be painted, the garage cleaned, the gardens weeded, the carpets shampooed, and all that painting... ugh

For each "little" task we complete comes another trip to the do-it-yourself store, and a round of 20 questions with the cashier...

{insert cute cheery tone here} “Hi…do you have one of our new INCENTIVE cards yet? It will only take a minute to sign you up, so you can start receiving special discounts; which includes 2.5% off anything you purchase today. It will also entitle you to free gifts and good karma throughout the entire year.”

"It will only take a second….ready?"

1) Name?
2) Mailing address?
3) Email?
4) Home phone?
5) Work phone?
6) Cell phone?
7) Fax number?
8) Social insurance number?
9) Banking PIN number?
10) Blood type?
11) Can you say the alphabet backwards while standing on your head?
12) Would you like us to send you samples in the mail?
13) When would be the best time to call and inconvenience you?
14) Do you collect frequent flyer miles?
15) Do you own or rent your home?
16) Who would you like to be in your next life?
17) How much money do you make?
18) What size shoe do you wear?
19) Would you also be interested in opening a store credit card with a 0% interest rate for the year; after which will only be increased to 49.8%?
20) And finally...have you ever wanted to slap someone?"

Note to self: if I ever get married a second time, pick someone handy or rich so I don't have to do this fix-up stuff again.

The real estate agent comes tomorrow, I'm hoping for a quick sale!


  1. Don't you just hate fixing up the house for other people?

    I think you should just answer every question with a question. "What is your name?" "How much money do you make?" Try it and let me know how it goes.

  2. I hate those programs and cards every store seems to run. I've got so many cards on my key ring, it's ridiculous.

  3. You're going to move anyway, why not just say "no thanks" lol.

  4. Don't you hate it when they corner you with all that information you didn't expect to be giving?

  5. Ha ha ha!! So true!!!! And funny, the way you've presented it.

  6. Hello, Oh My, that sounds like sooo much work. Or you can just knock off a few bucks and sell "as is." That's what I do. Actually, people think they are getting a bargain and they would try to talk you down to that price anyway.
    Good luck. Selling homes is really difficult these days.

  7. It's so much easier to just say "no, thank you". Why don't these places just give you the best price to begin with and cut out all the BS?

  8. Moving and/or selling is a royal pain in the rear end. Unfortunately, I was born to be hand, but poor!

  9. They should've just cut to the final question. I hope it all goes as smoothly as possible...Keep breathing.

  10. Umh, I meant to say "handy" not hand.
    "I was born to be hand." What the heck!