Fall of the socks

The cool breeze. The changing colors of the leaves. The angry skies. The smell of burning wood in fireplaces. Flannel sheets tucked warmly on the bed. Daylight Savings Time cussed about in line at the coffee shop. Teen aged girls are fully covered, wearing sweater and furry boots. The smells. Starbucks peppermint mocha is back for a 'limited time'. I think I like fall.

Except for the socks!

During the summer husband wears sandals (without socks of course, I already won that battle) and during the fall makes the transition to socks and shoes, but not one pair of socks, no. Husband wears two pairs of socks during the winter... Which means, not only more laundry, but more for me to pick up.

When husband arrives home from work, he sheds the first pair of socks. These usually land on his side of the bed, the foot of the bed or on top of the laundry hamper. Never IN the laundry hamper. The second pair of socks linger on his feet a little longer, they make it through supper and coffee, but depart during TV time. This second pair of socks almost faithfully land on the corner of the couch.




So apart from the dirty stinky socks all over my house, I like fall. UGH.

What's with all the plastic?

For some reason, husband never carries cash. If we're out he'll give me this 'Dawn can you get this' look, which is fine, provided he hasn't raided my change purse and kiddo forgot to make her bed and therefore hasn't earned her allowance. Any given day of the week I can open his wallet to find a multitude of receipts for under two bucks.

Today on the way home from school/work, we pulled into the mall, I ran into Marks Work Warehouse to buy a new pair of scrub pants and he ran into Bulk Barn to get some salt. Husband got distracted, or lost his list, I'm not sure which and ended up with a bag full of assorted candies but no salt. SO we ducked in, grabbed a salt and headed to the cash.

The salt came to a whopping $1.73. We could probably find $1.73 just looking under the cushions of our couch, or in the car's ashtray. BUT, he never has cash. So he whipped out the credit card and I cringed. I rooted around in my purse and pulled out a toonie, which husband insisted he didn’t need. ”It’s faster just use my card!”

Everything is STUPID...

Stupid kettle. Why the hell do you choose today to not boil! Stupid coffee canister that emptied itself and didn’t remind me to buy more. Stupid kettle. Stupid coffee perculator. Stupid stupid caffeine I need so badly.

Stupid smoke alarm. Every time I open the oven it goes off. I spend that much time standing under it waving a dish cloth that whatever was cooking in the first place burns! Stupid loud fire alarm. Stupid beep, beep, beep, Dawn-is-cooking-again alarm, jeebus I'm only boiling water!

Stupid thirty-something brain. If you don’t behave and start absorbing all this material I’m reading for my exams the way you used to, I swear I will stab you with a Q-tip! Stupid, stupid week and a half of finals.

Stupid underwire bras. Stupid heavy boobs don’t stand at attention like those of the perky 20 something year olds I go to school with. Wires going everywhere, digging into my sides. Need extra bounce control, extra support and then the stupid things, they’re hitting me in the chin. Stupid contraption. Stupid boobs.

Stupid dog. Won’t eat her own food, stands at by the table looking up at you with those giant pug eyeballs and the please, please look on her face. The second you lay down your snack to answer the phone, she jumps up on the couch and slobbers all over it. Stupid drooled on chocolate covered peanut butter pretzels, I want to eat you anyways.

Stupid long weekend. Had to fall smack in the middle of week and a half stupid exam schedule, had to fall right into Birthday week, so I can’t properly enjoy you and no one is around to go to Kiddo’s birthday party. Stupid brats, who don’t know how to RSVP.

Stupid post. Don’t even got a real ending cause I need to go fan the smoke alarm, stab my brain with a Q-tip, re-read my pathophys notes for the sixteenth time, remove my bra, grab another handful of chocolate peanut butter pretzels and finish boiling that pot of water to make instant coffee.